What upppppppppp.
Life has been slow lately. I think it’s because work hasn’t been as busy as I expected. It’s not surprising, given circumstances with all the world politics and economy. But I’ve been keeping myself busy doing unproductive things like play the new Monster Hunter Wilds by myself and with the boys. The Last of Us season 2 is also dope!

Ok ok see you next time!

Edit May 11, 2025: Happy Mom day. I took momma out for dinner. Then I asked the waitress if she was a mom and she said yes, so I gave her more tips. 🥹🥹

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“Philosophers are people who know less and less about more and more, until they know nothing about everything. Scientists are people who know more and more about less and less, until they know everything about nothing.”

― Konrad Lorenz

When philosophers speak about “Nothing”, it is still something about nothing. It’s like how the word “nothing” still meanings something about nothing. So what does it mean when one knows nothing about everything?

Martin Heidegger saw nothing as fundamental that is found through the experience of anxiety, like existential angst. It is something that lurks behind every one of us that we never pay attention to. Yet this experience of anxiety is foundational to our existence in life. Meanwhile, Jacques Lacan conceived of nothing as object a which causes anxiety when the Other’s desires fails. Something (nothing) exists only insofar that it fails as the subject speaks through language.

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The Symbolic and Lack (Object a)

I remember Bruce Fink explained this one very well. Imagine you walk into a library for the first time and you see plentiful of shelves filled with books before your eyes. At first, it might seem like all these books are complete which fills the entire library. But once you learn the Dewey Decimal System (the symbolic), your perception of these books changes: there now appears to be books missing on these shelves, but you aren’t sure which ones are missing or exactly where they’re located yet. It’s like the relationship between consciousness and the unconscious mind, or the example of the spot light (consciousness) that shines on the dark stage (unconscious) that I spoke of last time.

There is no lack without the subject who speaks through symbolic language (the only exception is a psychotic which involves a phenomenon known as “foreclosure”). And because humans are speaking animals with complex linguistic capacities for language, there is also something missing in said language that we are not consciously aware of—just like the books on the shelves. What we intend to consciously say is not what we unconsciously mean.

So if someone asks: Is the glass half empty or half full?
It is actually half full and half empty at the same time!

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Donald Trump

This guy made me lose money in the stock market. Though it’s chump change compared to others. Many people have their retirement savings invested in it. Just the other day, I overheard someone saying they lost almost $80,000 in a day. That’s crazy lol.

The point of tariffs is to encourage businesses to stop manufacturing overseas and make them manufacture in USA (it’s an isolationist/protectionist policy). The problem is that wages and cost of living are much more hefty in America than in other countries. This means even if companies invests a lot of money into building big factories and training people in America (which all takes time—from months to years), the end product will likely end up costing more than manufacturing overseas. After all, companies needs to make back the money they put into building these infrastructures and training people. If they can’t make a profit from it, then they will go bankrupt because this is not how capitalism works. People need to produce profit to survive.

So what then when people can’t afford all the extra costs on goods produced in America due to expensive labour/training even without the imported tariff taxes? Lower the wages of American labour so people can afford the products being bought? Fire people and automate the products? What so people are going to work for $5 an hour in America so they can buy things they can’t afford? Or are they going to buy goods with money they don’t have because machines took over their jobs? Are people going to go back to child labour and prison wages?

Unfortunately, America is not China where it has a significantly lower cost of living and people can live comfortably on low wages (if I remember correctly, America has triple the cost of living as China). And once the cost of living, products, and inflation goes up, it rarely comes back down (it’s like government debt which is not just borrowing money, but the government’s way of spending future money or owing money to the citizens). There are many reasons for this. But endless growth is the natural destiny of capitalism. It’s like what happened in COVID where everything got much more expensive, where the prices never came back down even after the pandemic.

But what if (most) companies chooses to not invest in manufacturing in America but waits out the 4 years of Trump? What if instead, they put the cost of tariffs onto consumer goods and let the buyers to cover the cost? This is whats going to happen for most companies. In general, tariffs won’t solve anything other than make things more expensive and more difficult for citizens. Tariffs would increase inflation like it did during COVID.

But do you see how there are no winning scenarios? Or maybe I just framed the argument wrong and someone should correct me. I guess on the bright side, America is definitely great again. They’re #1 in tariffs in the world with a really big penis for sure.🤡

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The Rental Car

I rented a blue Nissan Sentra SR while my Golf R is getting hail damage repaired. The Sentra is slow, but it is super good on gas. It’s nice that it runs on cheaper 87 octane gas compared to 91 for my R. I just think it’s silly that the car is a “Sports Rally” trim but uses a constant variable transmission (CVT).😥 A lot of economy cars uses CVT due to fuel efficiency and its cheaper manufacturing costs. Instead of using actual gears, the transmission uses a belt that is controlled by 2 pulleys that can expand and contract to imitate different gear sizes (search it up). This way, it lets the car have infinite gear ratios. But the reason I find it funny is it’s kind of poser to call the car “Sports Rally” while using a CVT. Don’t get me wrong, CVT is good for what it is designed for. But it doesn’t have much place in sporty cars, though the Sentra is hardly sporty.

Most performance cars with a lot of power will never use CVT because it is not good at transferring power. When the car engine puts out more torque and horse power (say, 300lbs of torque with 300hp), the CVT belt will slip from the high torque and lose a good chunk of that power during the power transfer from the engine crank to the wheels. While all cars will lose power during this transfer, performance cars loses less due to their power train designs, where dual clutch transmissions (DCT) are often favoured. But they’re more complex and expensive than CVT. It’s basically two manual gearboxes combined as one. Manufacturers uses different names for their own version of this transmission. BMW literally abbreviates it as “DCT”. Volkswagen calls it “DSG” (Direct Shift Gearbox), and Porsche calls it “PDK” (Porsche-Doppelkupplungsgetriebe 😦).

When manufacturers advertise horsepower numbers for a specific car, that number is usually reported at the engine and not at the wheels. When an American or Japanese maker markets a 150hp car, that car is realistically only putting 100-120hp at the wheels. The only exception are German cars that advertises hp at the wheels (BMW, Mercedes, Volkswagen, Audi, etc.). They are also known to downplay their factory 0-100km/h times. In short, many German cars are faster than what the manufacturer claims.

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Electric Cars

A lot of car enthusiasts likes cars with sound because it gives driving the extra emotion and adrenaline. It’s not always about speed. This is why some of the new performance EVs have speakers to make fake car sounds Lol. I think it’s really stupid. They should just own up to their spaceship whirling sounds and keep them.

EVs are cool, but they are too heavy. You often hear EV enthusiasts boast about straight line speed and acceleration. But it’s kind of a one trick pony because they lose all their gains when they have to turn due to the weight of the car. It’s also sometimes due to ride height (i.e. body roll when cornering). Many American cars have an obsession for acceleration where you can see it in big heavy cars like the Jeep Trackhawk, Dodge Ram TRX, or Ford F-150 Raptor. It’s not surprising due to the drag racing culture in America.

Excessive weight is the same reason why the new 2025 BMW M5 got so much shit from the media because it weighs 5400 pounds for a performance sedan. My Mk8 Golf R weighs 3400lbs and it’s not even considered light. By contrast, a Mazda MX-5 (Miata) weighs 2500lbs and is one reason why they are so popular among enthusiasts. Its weight makes it very agile around corners. Lighter cars with good horse power will have a higher power to weight ratio. It’s the same reason why people like performance bikes.

The weight of cars affects handling in many ways. It’s about physics as much as it is about how well they are designed and set up. But it’s like driving a truck. Heavy and taller cars carries more inertia into corners and under steers. It’s like you want the car to turn more as you are cornering, but it keeps fighting you to go straight or go wide on your turn; and you lose traction if you go fast enough. Weight also makes tires wear out faster and brake distance often increases.

To build and design a well rounded car that is fast in the straights and also fast when cornering is not easy. This is why car manufacturers tests and push the limits of their cars on race tracks that have a good balance between straights and turns. Unless it’s a drag race, it doesn’t matter how fast you can accelerate when your car turns like a boat.

Just look at Tesla that likes to compare their EVs with real track weapons then claims how they are faster than them. The Cybertruck might beat a Porsche 911 while towing a 911 in a drag race, but you have to race a track weapon on a race track for these comparisons to mean anything Lol. Anyone who thinks a Cybertruck towing a 911 can beat a 911 GT3 RS on the track are probably delusional. 😂 There was a video where they put a Porsche 992 GT3RS (the new version of 911) with a Tesla Model S Plaid on the Nurburgring (link). The Tesla had double the Porsche’s horsepower and still lost to it by 34 seconds (something like 1000 hp versus 500). Now put the two cars in a 30 lap race and the Porsche will lap the Tesla.

Those who watch Formula 1 will know. Teams spends so much time and money just to shave 0.10 second off their lap times. A 34 second difference from single lap is huge in a race. With this said, there are some EVs that are really quick on the track. Those are few in between. But I think EVs will eventually catch up in terms of raw track performance over time.

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How did Renee even find my blog?

I was thinking about this the other day. I’m not sure how she found it. It was likely from a girl who used to work there that I befriended. In my 6-8 years of being there, she was the one of the two or three people who worked there that I mentioned this blog to. But I spoke about this girl before several posts ago. She had a small crush on me back then who was very empathetic and emotionally mature. It’s not surprising given that she told me she goes to therapy. She has gone through some things that I won’t talk about. But I feel for her. It’s even more tragic for me to say, but I think her experiences are what made her a great person. After all, she knows what it feels like.

She was understanding and independent who didn’t get swayed by other people’s opinions of me. Coming to think about it, she was quite authentic and was one of the few people I met from there who didn’t approach me sideways. At least not completely Lol.

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“So I guess Eashel’s boyfriend does read your blog.”

Lmfaooo.💀 If my intuition is correct about Renee telling Eashel about this site, then there is a good chance her boyfriend knows about it. Who knows. I’m sure he is a fan if he does.😏 But I don’t care if he reads it. And I won’t be surprised if he hates my guts.😂 I don’t even know who he is. Like I don’t know if he is a gangster with a gun or just some guy who sells feet pics on OnlyFans. But the last thing I want is some 20 year old kid trying to fight me because I ain’t fighting anyone. LOL I’m joking. I’m sure he is a great person.

I haven’t seen Eashel in a while because I stopped going there for the past month. I need a break, but I might return later. Maybe after I get my car back and install my new wheels. I saw her car parked outside while I went to grab some lunch today (the place is next to the coffeeshop). We used to always park beside each other. I kind of miss her. 🥹 She is so cute, especially when she laughs or bites her tongue when she is focused on her work lol. Too bad she likely forgot about me. I realized I can never do nice things for people because they take it for granted. And it’s funny because I often ask for nothing in return. Yet they like to return me with shit.

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Who else reads this site

My old friend Natalia probably reads it. I wrote about her in my very first random thought post. Actually the other day, I found a note she wrote me and put on my car from years ago that says, “Hi Boobs❤️”. LOL What a loser. I’ve been using it as a book mark for a book by Soren Kierkegaard called Works of Love. 🥺

That old ass woman knows too much about me. I should get her assassinated. Too bad I also know all her secrets. I’ve even seen her naked. More than once as a matter of fact; like at least 10 times. 😂 Nutella and I are definitely still BFFs (Bad Friends Forever).

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The difference between the Other and Barred Other

The barred Other is the Other that people knows about at a conscious level as castrated and repressed subjects. Just like the split subject with an “S” with a strike through, the barred Other is often written with a crossed out A. The barred Other tells us that we don’t know what it wants, so we fantasize it by desiring (speaking)!

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Housing Crisis and Shortage of Workers in Canada

People may sometimes hear on the news that there is a shortage of construction workers in Canada and will continue to have shortage for decades to come. Do you want to know the truth? There is actually a shortage of good wages, and not a shortage of workers. If companies want more workers, they should pay better and be more competitive. Wages in construction has been stagnant for a long time. In fact, some actually got lower. Bids are extremely competitive and profit margins are ultra slim. So if you want more money, you have to get more work, or do more OT—if there are any. Whether you are union or subcontract, most trades don’t get paid enough for what they do. This is the truth. But don’t get me wrong. If you bust your ass 12 hours a day, 6-7 days a week, you can make well over 100k for sure (most people I work with are all over 100k). But did you know that the construction industry has one of the highest suicide rates out of every industry? There are genuinely good reasons for it. By the way, I’m a finishing carpenter; or more specifically a trim carpenter.

Whenever you hear people complain that “there is a shortage of worker” in any industry, it usually just means “there is a shortage of companies willing to pay people a good wage for their work”. The construction industry is a good example of the free market playing itself out where it competed itself out of competition with other industries lol. While I can’t speak much for commercial side, many residential builders and developers tries to throw everyone under the bus so they can make all the money. You really have to wonder where all the extra money went when housing costs has been going up so much in the last couple of years in Alberta. And it’s not just because of inflation—especially where I live, when so many people are moving over to buy up all the homes because places like Vancouver and Toronto are too unaffordable. It’s funny because they are importing the same problems from those places into Alberta.

If the government thinks making more people join the trades will fix the problem of labour shortage, it actually might make problems worse where the abundance of labour drives wages even further downwards due to over competition (too much supply). All it will do is get more people to accept and work for the mediocre wages that construction already has, or worse. The real problem lies within all the bureaucracy, taxes, and big builders and land developers who wants more and more of the pie. Give some of that pie back to the people who actually gets the hard work done and more people will join the trades. I sometimes hear politicians say how they will remove the bureaucracy and taxes to make homes cheaper. I somehow doubt much of the money saved will go into the home buyer’s pockets, even if it happens. Maybe only a portion at best. Just look at carbon tax being removed/paused, did groceries get cheaper? Nope! They need to keep the profit to maintain the growth of their businesses.

Still sad to say. Things will never turn back to the way it was decades ago when people can afford a family and a house on a single income (I mean you still can if you make bank). Now everyone just rents and helps the landlord pay their mortgage. Late capitalism is cooked and is ran by morons 90% of the time. What’s even more sad is that we all took part in it one way or another to make it what it has become today.

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“Fashionable Nonsense” by Alan Sokal

I’ve only read excerpts of that book. I know there were lots of drama around it. The book is famed for critiquing many French philosophers like Derrida, Lacan, Irigaray, Latour, and many more. Sokal criticizes how French philosophers likes to use mathematical equations and ideas that has nothing to do with mathematics or science.

People who studies French philosophy don’t take Sokal’s criticism very seriously because he is criticizing ideas that he does not have any intentions to understand. Sokal is like pulling your stereotypical strawman argument where he is more concerned about making a political statement than engage with any ideas that he is attacking. A bit like Stephen Hicks among other critics.

There are several responses to this book by some renown scholars, one that includes Jacques Derrida. But I remember Bruce Fink made one of the best response. I believe it was from a book called, Lacan to the Letter. Fink is a really good writer on Lacan. I highly recommend his work.

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Logocentrism, psychoanalysis, and deconstruction

Last time, I referenced on how knowledge and reason fails us when one faces the truth or love, I referenced the “logos” in parenthesis to highlight some of Jacques Derrida’s criticism to what he refers as “Logocentrism” (remember when I spoke about knowledge and truth are different things; truth is the failure of conscious knowledge). To say that someone is logocentric is to imply how we favor our knowledge as the center of our endeavors. While Derrida’s problem with logocentricism is not identical to the psychoanalytic approach, the problem is that, at the heart of epistemology (the study of knowledge) lies its relation with the question of the unconscious; just as it is filled with problems with the experience of temporality (time) for Derrida.

Psychoanalysis introduces the problems and conditions which allows for the rupture and discovery of new knowledge and truth to occur—like how one discovers that the ocean tides are influenced by the position of the moon. While I’m not denying the genius of human inventions and intelligence, I’m emphasizing on the process which makes new knowledge possible. A scientist might know many things about worldly matters who can prove it through empirical evidence, but what is “knowing”? What is experience? What is the silent voice you hear in your mind when you read this sentence?

Logocentrism has been criticized by different intellectuals over the last century. Yet such criticism and definition of the term had also been criticized by some contemporaries such as Jordan Peterson. Peterson seem to agree that people should favor knowledge and truth. While I agree with him on this matter, truth and knowledge are different things—at least when you talk about them under deconstruction and psychoanalysis. It is why logocentrism became a problem in the first place (i.e. truth is the failure of knowledge—I’ve explained this in so many different ways over the past years). No doubt, Peterson is not a dedicated reader of these disciplines. He is not much better than Alan Sokal on this matter. I would take his criticism of “post-modernism” with a grain of salt.

Many people who criticize these ideas usually aren’t well trained enough in the disciplines to criticize anything from these fields. Then you read Giles Deleuze and Felix Guattari who takes jabs at psychoanalysis and people lose their minds! Or you read their work on the concept of “body without organs” that rethinks consciousness and its unconscious relationship with the person’s organs that operates without the conscious mind’s control (i.e. homeostasis). Then if you study further, you might start reading about possibilities on consciousness that might exist on a molecular level (i.e. cells) that is immanent within our bodies. Or you start reading about whether artificial intelligence can have an unconscious like humans. This is where you start seeing intersections between philosophy and science.

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Aeon Essays: Depressive Realism

Aeon essays has a wide collection of great writings and perspectives. Recently, I was recommended an essay called “Depressive Realism” by Julie Reshe (link), who was mentored by Alenka Zupancic, a well known figure in the Lacanian circle from Slovenia. It’s an essay that suggests how people who are “normal” and “happy” lives with cognitive biases in fantasies by running away from the truth of reality. Where as people who are depressed sees the world as it is: a living hell. And that the entire ideology of happiness that society tries to force upon people has become a toxic practice where its facade must be maintained at all costs while trying to eliminate all negative thoughts. It’s interesting because there are lots of problematic ideologies in our world today that most people thinks are normal. It’s like seeing health scientists who tries to find ways to help the population cope with all the issues modern life has created.

This essay was an intimate read because the author was very open with her experiences. I kind of like her Lol. Her use of language was precise and spot on. I like how she pointed out that the outcome of psychotherapy is to not achieve happiness. This is very true. Psychoanalysis makes us confront things that we try to avoid and have been lying to our selves all our lives. I said this last time in #26, humans are very good liars—the only desire we fulfill is the Other’s desire.

Near the end of the essay, Reshe talks about the use of the word “but” and how her readers might be saying to themselves, “Yes, life is horrible, ‘but’….” and tries to say something positive as a form of defensive mechanism. This is from psychoanalysis on how patients likes to use the word “but” as a way to correct their Freudian slips or mistakes, which are not mistakes. Such that I unconsciously implied X meaning, “but” I actually consciously meant Y. I remember I spoke about this before (Lacan also talks about this). In the case of depressive realism, the Other is not our parents, wives or husbands, or boy/girlfriend’s desires. It is the ideology of happiness who says no to depression, you must always be happy where all negative thoughts and emotions must be abolished!

Anyways, it’s an interesting position to think about.