Yo what up.
We are going to keep this one light and not as intense as the last one in #33.😅 Work hasn’t been all that busy. The economy is not doing very well from all the politics going on. But it’s also nice because I get random days off Lol.

I wish you guys a happy 2026!
-Booby.


Edit Jan 26 2025: I added a chunk of writing at the end of this post about someone.🤔

LOL Dude. I just had the wildest dream last night. I woke up and I was like what just happened!? Good news is I got up and wrote all of it down at 4AM. Two of my friends were in it. A psycho was in it. My car was in it. Eashel was also in it.🥺 I’ll try to remember to share it next time.💭

* * *

2025 Stats

According to my inaccurate blog stats, this site grew +38% in views between 2024 and 2025. I say this every year, but the stat tracker is not accurate. I’m aware that many people who comes on here don’t get logged. So the actual numbers are different from year to year. I don’t even care very much and I think it will hit the peak soon.

In 2025, I published a big post on Karl Marx. I had many doubts because I knew I might get cancelled for posting something this crazy.😂 But I figured it’s hardly the craziest and controversial content I’ve written on here. My writings on psychoanalysis speaks tons, especially the ones on the death drive, graph of desire, and clinical psychoanalysis. And besides, those who wanted to cancel me would’ve done so by now. I’m also not famous enough for it to matter LOL. I’ve lost friends from some of the things I’ve said on here. But if I could lose them this easily, then they weren’t really my friends to begin with.🤷‍♂️

* * *

New Body Kit

I bought the Maxton front lip, side skirts, and spoiler extension on Black Friday last year. My car will look like this (link) after I install it. For everyday driving, body kits are for looks, especially the front lip which alters the appearance of the car (the horizontal piece of trim that attaches underneath the front bumper). I think the front lip completes the look of the car. Performance wise, the purpose is to create a lower air pressure zone under the car at higher speeds which produces a vacuum effect, where the air pulls the car closer to the ground improving its traction. This effect can be amplified by lowering the car.

But I don’t think I will lower mine. The Golf 8R has a ground clearance of 4.7″ which is already low. Anything lower just means I will have trouble with speed bumps, going up driveways, or underground parking lots with steep road/ramp angle changes. But a lowered car does look better.🤔

I will be installing the kit in spring after I switch back to summer tires. I don’t know if I should install it myself or get a body shop to do it for me. It seems simple enough, but I don’t think I have all the tools to remove the front bumper. I could always do it the lazy way and use 3M VHB + self taping screws. But I don’t want to risk having my front lip fall off when I’m on the highway. The wind can rip the front lip off if installed incorrectly or poorly. It’s funny I say this because the rear spoiler extension install is just 3M automotive tape Lol.

My next upgrade might be a new exhaust system. The stock exhaust is too tame and I would like to have the car a tiny bit louder. I’ve been leaning towards the Invidia R400 due to it’s cheaper price and not over the top sound. Ideally, I want to keep my car’s exhaust valves which lets me control how loud the car is by opening and closing 2 of the 4 exhausts. But I’m also considering others. I’m open to buying lightly used ones. They’re not cheap and are pretty useless unless I tune the car to stage 2. It’s probably better if I just save the money. So I’ll have to think about it.

* * *

Subject and Language

I think the easiest way is to think of it like this.
It is the idea that humans cannot produce any interpretations of their external or outside world without signifying it through language. This cup that sits in front of me on a table is not simply a cup, but it is a cup with a branded logo on it which signifies all sorts of cultural, social, and economic meanings. The table is also an IKEA table which signifies a host of other meanings. It may also hold sentimental or other forms of value.

The language that one signifies for themselves out of this world is achieved through predetermined contexts, conditions, meanings, and during a specific time; it is produced through culture, law, society, history, the people we know, and everything that had already been symbolized, externalized, structuralized, and predefined by others. Such exteriority would get internalized as if it is the movement of our inner thoughts almost like it is our perspective—which it is, in some sense. As we can see, something always gets in the way of this movement where the subject succumbs to meanings that were never quite determined by them, but by an epoch defined by a certain form of historicity. Yet the subject is actually always there who is present in thought and meanings, but she is also not there. The subject is not-whole and falls into the matrix of meanings.

Does this mean the meanings that we produce about the world in our lives are uncertain? Not at all. But it is never the end of signification and there are always blind spots. Holding onto meanings is never the end of meaning itself. There is always more meanings that are not yet discovered, are unconscious, or simply neglected and ignored.

I think if humans can understand this important dimension in what produces truths and differences which constitutes our perspectives, our world would actually be a lot different than it is today.

* * *

Specialty Coffee

I forgot to share last time. But my friend introduced me to specialty coffee and took me to a place called Eight Ounce in Calgary. They’re apparently really popular in North America and used to only do wholesale until there were enough local demand where they opened up a retail section. It’s the perfect place for coffee nerds.

I bought a ESPRO French press and a Timemore C3s Pro hand grinder. The French press is mostly made of plastic and feels cheap, but it was only $25. Whereas the hand grinder is well built and has been consistent with the different levels of grinds that I’ve been doing.

They sell freshly roasted coffee beans from all around the world. I’ve tried a few several roasters from different countries such as Father’s from Czech Republic, Manhattan Coffee Roaster from Netherlands, and House of Funk from Vancouver Canada. I also tried some local roasters like Monogram. I only drink these black. But it’s harder to distinguish the differences when I drink coffee versus espresso. In espresso, I can really taste the difference because it is so strong, whereas coffees made with the French press is more diluted. Right now, I want to try some Middle Eastern coffee beans.

I took up on my friend’s recommendation and bought a WACACO Minipresso GR2 that can make me espresso shots anywhere I want. It’s not the best out there, but it does the job well enough. Good grinders and espresso machines are expensive and I’m not hardcore enough to buy them, yet lol. But I gotta say the espresso shots I’ve been making are still really good. The solid chunk of espresso puck that I get after compressing the grind is super cool Lol. I usually make them at 1:2 or 1:3 ratio. I always weigh my coffee grounds and output. But after some tests, I think I like 1:2.5 most.

My friend bought me some coffee beans from Switzerland which is really good in espresso with strong notes of Earl Grey. But it’s a little too light for me. I’m not the biggest fan of strong acidic notes (I don’t think I under extracted). Meanwhile, Funk’s Technicolour beans are really good. They’re smooth, caramel-chocolatey, and not as acidic.

I don’t plan on going too ham at this coffee thing. But it has been a cool and tasty experience.
Meanwhile, my friend’s office at work is literally a cafe where his shelves are full of espresso cups, different coffee grinds for the day, portable grinders, weight scale, and espresso makers.😂

* * *

“Hi, I would like to be your friend”

Ever wondered why I never responded? That’s got to be one of the worst conversation starter ever LOL. Is this how people talk? Do you think I should just go up to Eashel or some random girl and be like, “I want you to be my girlfriend”?? It’s not even a false statement. I even wish it was that simple.😂

Or maybe dude was trying to bait me to click on a virus or something.🤔

* * *

German Car Tier list

I said I would make a German car tier list last time.

It is difficult to rank German cars based on reliability because their engineering and design philosophy is very different from Japanese cars. Many German cars are engineered for performance which is why they “can be” less reliable. But this is also why they all drive better than your average Japanese cars at similar price range. German cars are more refined and precise. Even the sounds of their car doors opening and closing are engineered. They also have noticeably heavier doors than Japanese cars.

Japanese cars are known for revolving their design philosophy on longevity, reliability, and ease of maintenance. Meanwhile, many German cars are always trying to push for performance, new tech, and doing things other manufacturers hasn’t done before. This is especially true for their top trims.

German cars are famous for being complex and over engineered—like a fancy watch with precise parts working together. The more complex and precise the car, the more expensive the repairs can be. You can’t neglect maintenance the way you can with Japanese cars, where you can run it with a few broken parts. If something goes wrong in German cars, the longer you put off repairing/replacing that particular part, the more likely it will cause other issues which will make it even more expensive to repair. But if you properly maintain German cars, they will last just as long as Japanese cars. German cars gets a bad rep because people actually have to keep up with servicing their cars. Their maintenance can be costly and their cars often has a higher MSRP in North America. Yet depending on the car, many depreciates fast because everyone knows repairing them is expensive.

With all this in mind, my tier list of German cars that is based on design and performance with a mild emphasis on reliability:

1. Porsche
2. BMW and Mercedes-Benz
3. Audi
5. Volkswagen 🥲

Porsche is on a different league than the rest. They make a lot of great cars and are known for building race track weapons. Keep in mind that Porsche owns half of Volkswagen, the latter which also owns Audi, Lamborghini, Bentley, and Skoda. They also used to own Bugatti. But I think Porsche is easily top of the list in terms of build quality, performance, and innovation. They also hold world records at the prestigious Le Mans 24 hours race. Their competitors are super car brands like McLaren and Ferrari. Sure, these brands builds fancy, fast, luxurious and expensive cars. But if you want a pure driving machine? It’s Porsche 100%.

I think BMW makes great cars. They have an edge over Mercedes in terms of sporty driving dynamics. Although they have fallen off a little with their heavy cars and ugly front grille designs, their M cars are still where it’s at. There is a reason why BMW owners are stereotyped as aggressive drivers who don’t like using turn signals. The brand tends to attract certain audiences: people who likes to speed and drive recklessly. The M3 for example, is an iconic car. The M4? A monster.

Mercedes shines over BMW in luxury, interior design, and trims with a slightly less sportier drive. I don’t think any manufacturer can match the attention to detail of Mercedes. If you ever sat in an S class, then you will really see it. Yet, Mercedes AMG is also on par with BMW M with different tradeoffs. If I consider the two with motorsports, then Mercedes takes the cake easily over BMW. Mercedes held many world championships in Formula 1. The world’s first gas powered car was invented by Karl Benz, where it later became the foundation for Mercedes-Benz.

While Mercedes are known for their luxury in North America, they actually make a lot of regular cars in Europe such as taxis and garbage trucks. Mercedes diesel engines are famous for being incredibly reliable, with many hitting over 1 million km in their ODO. In NA, Merc is only worth it if you buy C class and above. For the price of an A-class (their lowest trim in NA), you can get a top trim of a lower brand like Volkswagen or Toyota.

Meanwhile, I think Audi makes good cars, especially if you buy their S trim and above (S and RS). They’re known for their Quattro AWD system and fancy tech. The Audi RS3 and RS6 are some of my favorite cars. Though I think their lower A trims are not worth it because they’re just a slightly fancier versions of a VW Jetta.

On the other hand, I put Volkswagen last not because they make bad cars, but because all the other manufacturers are significantly more hardcore at engineering crazy high performance and luxury cars that VW can’t compete with the way that I am ranking them.

VW is the only brand on this list that makes “affordable” everyday cars that are cheaper to repair. They’re well known for the VW Beetle. They also have the performance trim of “R” cars (different from their “R-line”). The Golf R32, now known as the Golf R, is the world’s first production car that uses a modern dual-clutch transmission. Today, almost every German performance car uses one. While some people thinks VW are bad cars, there are many VWs that are reliable and has gone through many generations of refinement and development, notably the EA888 and the VR6 engine.

* * *

World Problems

We have climate change, environmental disasters, inflation, wage depression, economic recessions, endless production making a lot of wastes. We also got a lot of cultural, moral, and ethical regression. Now we have AI threatening people’s jobs. We have social media and the internet messing a lot of things up. Meanwhile, many wages remain stagnant and will likely never catch up to inflation because all the money being printed ends up in the CEO’s salary and bonuses. Housing is also becoming increasingly unaffordable.

Then everyone blames it on someone or something else. If you ask me, the entire Western democratic experiment has become more or less a failure….especially when you start hearing people telling you to “vote for the lesser evil”. Deep down, they realize both left and right wing are cooked. But it is also a sign of a bigger problem in “democracy” where parties are funded and riddled with private interests from oil companies, etc. Though I’m not saying that democracy is a bad thing at all. It’s just that I think some people are evil without even realizing it lol. Some likes to blame the system, but it is just as much as an issue with humans than it is with the system. Just look at America with all the immigration issues and gun violence that is happening right now. No offense to my American friends, but it’s almost like they need Batman LOL.

Meanwhile when AI takes over people’s work, how will people make the money to buy the stuff these companies sell? I think if capitalism wasn’t a thing, AI wouldn’t be completely bad. It might eliminate people’s critical thinking skills and cause all sorts of other problems. But it’s not like this isn’t already an issue LOL.🥴 Technology has ruined a lot of things. But it also made other things better, like health and medicine. Working less might not always be bad if we didn’t live in a world where everyone depends on the money they make to survive.

I remember reading a recent article talking about how many young people in Canada are delaying home ownership and decides to invest in the stock market instead. They’re smart because the housing market is broken. This new Prime Minister of Canada ain’t going to do shit unfortunately. But I bet it is the same story if the conservatives takes power.

But the stock market is also busted these days and has been quite volatile. Gold has been skyrocketing like crazy. This happens when people anticipate high inflation and economic downturn. Whereas some would rather buy gold than USD. And let me tell you, the AI bubble is real. But if you are young and invest long term, you will likely run into several market bubbles and crashes in your life time. I think learning to save is very important. Though it’s also important to not let it get in the way of life. I know a friend who lives ultra frugally because he is trying to save up to buy a house. Part of me asks, “At what cost?”.

Some of my friends who hates AI are hoping that the market will crash. But I don’t think they understand the gravity of effect that it would cause. It’s like those who wishes the housing market in Canada would crash so it becomes affordable. Whenever these things happen, it will always produce a ripple effect. For example, if the stock market crashes, everyone’s retirement savings and pension will get wiped out and take many years to recover (we are talking trillions of dollars). It will lead to massive budget cuts, unemployment (which leads to other things like the loss of homes, etc.), rise of crime, suicide, etc. It’s never anything good.

People say money can solve a lot of problems. But that’s only because money created these problems in the first place. Yet, if money did not exist, what can we use to represent value? What even is value? Would we go back to the old days where people trade for items? These are great questions to ask.

* * *

“Dating pretty girls on dating apps is a lot of work.”

Relationships are a lot of work, and it doesn’t even have to be romantic.

Dating apps or not, I feel like you need to have a high self esteem to date really attractive women because they will get hit on a lot, even if they turn them down and are just being friendly (this is the same for men too). It probably gets annoying LOL. They only need to post a a photo of themselves on social media and people would bombard them with messages. Some are addicted to these types of attention which can raise red flags in relationships. While others just wants to look good for themselves. But I’d imagine reality can hit hard for some of them once they get older and lose their pretty privilege.

I also hear people say that the more attractive people are not relationship material because they have so many “choices” (I am alluding to psychoanalysis). I don’t necessarily think this is true because it depends on the person. It’s about setting boundaries more than anything, even if it involves cutting contact. I’m not saying people shouldn’t have friends of the opposite sex. Though the people who are only or mostly friends with the opposite sex are usually a red flag—unless they’re gay.

Personally, I can’t date or be into more than one person at a time. When I’m into someone, I’m into just that one person and everyone else becomes far less interesting. I love some people like how I love my tea. Only those who knows will know.😅 Consequently, I’m not a fan of when people dates more than one person at a time when they are dating me. I’m not against others doing it, but it is a big no for me. Getting to know someone takes a lot of time and effort. I prefer the other party to be on the same page as me. I am committed and loyal. I’m not a fan being the second choice. Who would?

From personal experience, meeting people who are relationship material can be difficult. But I also understand it takes life experience, growing, and aging to get to that mentality in life for some. So I won’t always write people off quickly. We’ve all done stupid stuff when we were young. But I’m also not a door mat and I take betrayal very seriously.

Where you meet people also matters a lot. Chance comes into play, but at the end, most people who have their stuff together usually aren’t found at party places like clubs. Sure, some might go every once a while with friends and that’s cool. In fact, some of them might be relationship material. But these places also tends to attract specific types of people: those who goes for the actual music to dance, have fun, which again, is cool if it’s a genuine interest; and significantly more of those who goes there for flings, drugs, dirty dancing, and hook ups. There is a reason why these places are full of young people in their 20s.

This is a similar deal with dating apps which is also a mixed bag. But this isn’t to say that people can’t find love on them. Many do. There are genuine people on there who uses it in a healthy way. But it is also mostly just thirsty dudes trying to talk to a small group of women; or men trying to match with any woman while these same women are going for a selective 10% of men. I remember reading studies on this.

I personally don’t use them. I’m better off saving myself the effort, time, and headache. I do think these apps ruined relationships, commitment, and what it means to devote time and getting to really know someone. People are too distracted these days. It’s like they can’t focus on anyone or anything. One of my friend recently got a date on these apps where the girl ditched their dinner plans last minute because she found a better date. He didn’t take it personally, but I was like, “That’s dating apps in a nutshell” Lol. He should be glad that she cancelled. Someone who does these things are not worth it.

While there are exceptions, I think these apps also contributed to making people give up too easily in relationships because they know they can always find someone else or someone “better” by swiping on these apps. I said this long ago, dating has become sort of like consumerism and going out with the next best thing. For these reasons, I frown on them and not use them. Though I won’t judge others who uses it (unless…..🤔). I’ve had people telling me to use it, but I prefer to stick to my ethos on this one.🫡

…

And besides, my spider senses are telling me that Eashel might be single now. But I’ve been wrong before Lol. I only see her once a week. Sometimes less. I heard they opened a new store nearby where many people either quit, or moved over. So maybe I will never see her again.🥹I mean it’s only a matter of time before some life event happens where I don’t get to see her again. Timing is important. And if anything, time is running against us.

The other day, she looked and smiled at me for the first time in like a year lol. It totally caught me off guard. But it was so quick and casual that I wasn’t sure if it was a mistake, or if it was even at me. Maybe I read too much into it. Maybe she was busy. Or maybe she was smiling to another guy. I would talk to her if she is open to it. I won’t waste time. I would also keep it light. But then again, I’m not sure if she wants me to. It doesn’t help that she is always busy. I would take her out if she wants (to Home Depot of course!), but we’re not going anywhere if we can’t break the ice again. If she is single, she probably already has guys asking her out for Valentines and forgot about me.🥲 Her birthday is also coming up. If I remember correctly, she is turning 25. She is a grandma now.😂

I remember back when we still spoke, she once asked me why I go there so early and how she would sleep in if she was me. Then I told her I liked how quiet it is in the morning. But I actually omitted the most important reason: I wanted to see her and talk to her when she wasn’t as busy.🥺Does she actually think I enjoy sitting with the dad who can’t stop talking about boring shit to me 24/7?!?!?!? He is a nice dude, but I can’t stand him sometimes LOL. I sometimes even wish she or anyone would walk over and save me from this guy. I would rather sit with Eashel and get to know her more, even if she makes my heart pump REALLY really REALLY really fast like I have a heart attack.🥺

Either way, I try not to overthink it because there is not much I can do unless she drops a really obvious hint or straight up talks to me and be direct. And it’s okay if I’m wrong and she doesn’t want to talk. I would be disappointed for sure. But it’s okay. I just want her to be happy. The future is always to come.

…

Edit Jan 25, 2025:
I have to get this off my chest because I can’t unsee this stuff. It comes naturally to me.

I might be sassy right now. But Eashel has been a little strange lately. I had the suspicion that she is single because of how many glances she has been sneaking at me for the past month or so (plus that random smile). At one point, I caught her glancing at me then secretly giggling and whispered something to her coworker. Then her coworker looked over at me.🤔 I couldn’t hear what she said because I sat far away. I was also listening to music. But if I had to guess? She was all excited going like, “He is looking at me! Tehehehe”.🤣

I mean yeah, I sometimes look at her when I’m bored. Like oh wow, big secret: I think she is a cutie angel muffin pie LOL.🥺It’s not like she doesn’t already know. And it’s not like I don’t know she caught feelings for me. Unlike “some” people, when I’m interested in someone, I don’t pretend that I’m not into them.🙄It’s very counter productive. But if she is still taken, then I can see why she might be hiding it. And if this is true, then I actually feel bad for her boyfriend lol. She should stop and focus on her partner. I understand I’m really handsome and smart😂; and she probably melted when I wrote about how special she is to me and my views on love in #33.🥺 But she should focus on her relationship, not on me. Even if everything I said about her in #33 is true.💖

Today, I caught her staring at me again (don’t get me wrong, I like it Lol). She looked away really quick once I turned my head. You should’ve saw. Like bruhhh, she looked away at the speed of light LOL. She has been a little weird to say the least. But I’m not dealing with it anymore because there is not much I can do. And just to be sure, I’m not going to choose someone who doesn’t choose me. I had to learn this lesson the hard way from Renee. So it will be Eashel’s loss because I will definitely be top 5 best boyfriend in Canada.

I don’t know what it is, but Eashel has been noticeably happier in the past month or so. She is really expressive and cute Lol. It’s a little contagious.

…and I am happy that she is happy.😊